Today has been an ugly day. When I say ugly I just mean how I felt. It was actually a beautiful day outside, but as much as I tried to let it change my mood, it just didn't. It was just one of those days that no matter what I did, nothing was what I wanted to do. Nothing went right. Not a boo-hoo me day, just a completely blah day. It's these kinds of days that my head will take over and get a little crazy on me, but I'm keeping it in check. I have to call for a doctors appt this week so I'll be good there.

I'm worried about a lot of people right now. I think I just let the weight of everything come down on me today as I was already feeling down so it was easy to transition right into that. I'm praying, but I'm still worried about a lot of different things and people.

My work-out has suffered the last couple of days as I haven't really walked a full 4 1/2 mile walk in a while. I've been cutting it short and doing 3 1/2 and under. I really need to change that. I'm working out at home, almost obsessively. I can never just find a happy medium. It's all or nothing with me. So I find that I'm doing some kind of exercise if I'm standing too long with nothing to do. I guess I could be doing worse things, like eating. My scale goes down, then it goes up all the while my clothes keep getting bigger. Everyone keeps telling me I'm building muscle and it weighs more so that's why I've gained but it just ticks me off at this point. I want to keep going down, however at the same time I want to keep building some muscle. So I guess I've just got to deal with it, and get over it.